Mary Lawless Scobbo, 1950 - 2023
Of Boston and North Kingstown, Rhode Island, formerly of Medfield and Waltham, passed away peacefully on Saturday March 18th, 2023 surrounded by her loving family in the comfort of the Care Dimensions Hospice House in Lincoln.
Even with her very explicit instructions, these are the most difficult words we have ever written. So with a heavy heart and incredible love for such a remarkable woman, we write to share the life of Mary Lawless Scobbo, also known as Mamie, Mom and Nana.
Mary was born September 11, 1950 to her loving parents, Leonard and Genevieve, and grew up with her older sister Kathy and younger sister Anne in Waltham, Massachusetts. The three flawless Lawless sisters grew to create an indestructible bond. Today, it is unthinkable that their bond survived being roommates as teenage girls in a house with only one phone and one shower. Like characters from O’Casey, Shaw or Behan, the family of Lenny, Genevieve, Kathy, Mamie, and Anne had a beautiful life. With St. Mary’s Catholic Church and School at the center, the Lawless sisters and their many hometown friends made the most of the mid-century life. Moe Black’s, unbreakable sisterhood and, of course, Brigham’s ice cream; a beautiful life indeed.
The Lawless family was very proud that Mary received the Grover Cronin Scholarship for 1968.
Mary made lifelong friends during her four years at St. Mary’s High School. Over the years, those friends continued their traditional get togethers at the Chateau and at reunions. Through the years this group of men and women continue to keep in touch and reminisce through numerous Zoom calls. What a blessing to have such wonderful friends. The Notre Dame Nuns and Christian Brothers would be proud.
In 1968 Mary matriculated at Boston College via The School of Education, which, at the time, was one of only two programs available to women at BC. This limitation notwithstanding, the School of Education propelled Mary toward one of her two lifelong loves, the allure of education and teaching young children to read. A gifted student, the soon to be gifted educator, excelled academically at BC, graduating cum laude. Like the friends made in high school, Mary made lifelong friends of her fellow Eagles.
The other of Mary’s lifelong loves also came into focus at BC; an Italian kid from Long Island named Nick a/k/a Chuck. She had to get over his “New Yorkness” and his adherence to the Yankees, which she did by remaining a steadfast Red Sox fan. Still Mary saw something in Nick/Chuck and the two began dating during their freshman or sophomore year at BC (it depends on who you ask!). What began as sideways glances at the Eagles Nest in McElroy Commons grew to an amazing love and partnership of over 54 years with nearly 49 years of marriage. Though, when asked later in life how long she has been married, Mary would often smile and say, ‘15 wonderful years.’
Mary’s sense of humor was well known to be witty and self-deprecating. We can say without hesitation she was easily the funniest person we ever met. Her intelligence, timing and courage to say what others often left unsaid, was amazing. She’ll be rightfully remembered and celebrated for many things, but her personality may be chief among them. How else could she have managed those 15 wonderful years of marriage?
Always contributing to her source material was the wellspring of knowledge gained from ubiquitous books and later, Kindle. For any book we have ever read, Mary read it first, it took her less than a day to finish it and she’d moved on to the author’s other works. She could pepper her everyday conversation with quotes and themes created by masters of the English language, ranging from Shakespeare to The Beatles.
Mary’s passion for teaching young children to read commenced in Waltham in 1972. That unyielding passion continued when Nick and Mary moved to Medfield in 1978. From then until 1982 Mary taught at the Beacon Hill Nursery School in Boston. In 1982, she began her nearly 25 years of teaching in the Medfield elementary grades as both a full time and substitute teacher. Here again she made lifelong friends of fellow teachers and administrators. Reunions of these educators were blessed with her sense of humor.
Throughout her career, she had an amazing ability to connect with young students and help them on their learning journey. Nothing gave her more joy than to see a young first grader learn to read. She was fulfilled when a former student who became a published author contacted her to thank her and when other former students reached out to her directly or through acquaintances to acknowledge the impact she had on them. Even well into retirement, and perhaps inspired by her own grandsons, she could recall all of the children she taught who initially struggled with reading but then went on to brilliant lives and careers enriched with the English language (thanks to Mary, many of you are reading this now. You know who you are…). To all of you whom she helped along the way, we’re sure Mary would confidently say…. “you’re welcome.”
In 1976 Nick/Chuck and Mary welcomed the birth of their son Nick, in 1981 the birth of daughter Katherine, and in 1989 the birth of daughter Julia. Mary’s motherhood duties were quite varied, in fact they spanned from kindergarten to college - all in one year. As her children will attest, Mary was an example of how to be curious, to ask questions and to insert a joke at just the right moment. Her children learned to work hard, to have empathy, to advocate for others and to be beacons for their own friends and families. Of course not all went as planned. While her two daughters learned to pick up after themselves, her son, she claimed, must have been “raised by wolves.”
While she may have thought her children were great, she clearly saw their children as grand. Beginning in 2007 with Stella, and continuing with Joe, Vin, Genevieve, James and Charlie, Mary was the best “Nana” her grandchildren could have ever wanted. Throughout every stage of their lives from infancy and into teen years, Nana was there for them and an enormous part of their lives. Nana was the first person called for every milestone of her grandchildren’s lives.
Said your first word? Read your first book? Accepted to your first high school honors class? Scored your first goal? Yes – of course we can call and tell Nana.
Nana had unwavering and unconditional love for her grandchildren, and they carry that unconditional support as a deep part of their being. They will miss Nana maybe more than anyone, but they will always keep with them what she gave; unconditional love and great expectations.
While grandchildren marked a clear transition in Mary’s life, so too were there many others.
In her early 50s, after teaching young children for over 30 years, Mary went back to school herself. She completed her Master’s degree in library science from Simmons College. Upon graduation, Mary returned to work, this time as a librarian first in municipal libraries and then at Emerson and finally coming back full circle to become a research librarian at Boston College’s O’Neil Library, where she continued to be surrounded by books and fellow learners. Having raised three Boston College students herself, the library’s patrons provided a new source of material for her well-tuned wit. Mary continued at the O’Neil Library and as an occasional docent at BC’s McMullen Museum of Art into her early 60s when she ultimately retired to be a full-time Nana in 2012. BC students’ loss were her grandchildren’s gain.
In 2002 Mary and Nick/Chuck bought a beautiful property at Quidnessett Country Club in North Kingstown Rhode Island, only an errant Nick/Chuck 7-iron from Narragansett Bay. As a member of the Quidnessett Book Group, Mary again spread her warmth, wit, and sense of humor at the monthly get togethers to discuss the book for that month. Lifelong and close friendships with the Quidnessett neighbors and Book Group members echo her time in Waltham, college, and Medfield.
Mary exercised her decorating and design skills in 1996 when she oversaw a massive remodeling of their 1980’s Medfield home. Completed in time for her and Nick/Chuck to enjoy in 2021, Quidnessett provided Mary with another blank canvas for design, color, and texture as she oversaw a renovation there.
Both homes stand witness and symbol to the many parties, holidays, and dinners she enjoyed with her family and friends.
In 2017, Mary and Nick/Chuck sold the home in Medfield and rented an apartment in Boston from which Mary explored the Greenway, the North End, the Seaport District and various restaurants and entertainment venues in Boston. Perhaps her greatest Boston adventure was seeing Lady Gaga at Fenway Park in the summer of 2022 with her daughters, daughter in law and granddaughter. Yes she was a big fan.
All of Mary’s friends, from her early days in Waltham, to the kitchen tables of Medfield and book group of Quidnessett held an important part in her life. Whether comparing notes on children, gently ...cajoling… husbands or discussing their latest book, her friends meant the world to her and were a significant source of pride in her life.
Friends will grow older. The grandchildren will grow up. The family holidays and parties will continue. There will always be stories to share, jokes to tell, Julia to poke fun at – and time to feel badly afterwards. Nick will be too loud and sanctimonious about something and chianti will be spilled. Life will go on. However, our lives were enriched for having had Mary in them. And there will always be a seat for Nana at our tables.
With love for a remarkable woman,
Chuck, Nick, Katherine and Julia.
In lieu of flowers, or as a remembrance the family would appreciate donations in her name to the Greater Boston Foodbank https://www.gbfb.org/.
Please join her family and friends for a celebration of Mary’s life on Monday, March 27th from 11:00 AM to 2:00 PM at the Granite Links Club House, 100 Quarry Hills Drive | Quincy, MA 02169 / 617-689-1900
www.granitelinks.com